A very silly evening in the life of Heather

Last night I went to visit a friend in cloverdale. We'd agreed to get together for coffee, and she arranged to meet me at a particular Starbucks. I'm not usually good with directions, but I knew exactly where this Starbucks was so I didn't bother taking a map or anything. I rushed home from work and through dinner and leapt into my car, driving as fast as I could through evening traffic. All the water I'd drank for dinner was beginning to take effect, but I thought, never mind, I'll be there soon.
I arrived at the Starbucks, and she wasn't there! Suddenly I had the sneaking suspicion that I was in the wrong place. I asked the girls behind the counter if there was a second Starbucks in cloverdale on Route 10.
Yes, they said, just down the road. I hopped into my car, feeling bad about being late and rushed down Route 10. By this time my bladder was sending me very clear messages. I walked into the Starbucks, and there was Katherine! We hugged and said hi and I thought, okay, I'll just order a drink and while I'm waiting for it I'll find the bathroom.
Ha ha. Katherine had already ordered but she came to stand with me in line and chat. She's a great girl, one of those people who is always dressed nice- looks like an Italian supermodel- and totally gracious, outgoing, classy. No matter how I'm dressed I always feel a little grubby around her. So after my drink was ordered she was still talking and I couldn't exactly cut her off mid-sentence and say I needed to pee, which would have been such an un-classy thing to say.
I got my large tea and sat down on chairs with her. Now, my dear reader, that was the moment at which I should have graciously excused myself to find the bathrooms, but for some strange reason- perhaps a mix of insecurity and stupidity- I didn't. We talked and talked, which was pleasant enough, but I began to feel more and more like I was going to explode. I drank my tea, not even thinking that black tea is a diuretic (makes you pee more) and that I had a very large size cup. After a while I couldn't think of much else besides my bladder. We were deep into a serious, emotional conversation and I wanted to get up but it was too late and it would seem rude.... Ahhhhhh! I'm so ridiculously stupid! I can't believe I actually sat there and talked to Katherine for 2 hours!
After a while it was hard to breathe and I had to concentrate on not hunching up my shoulders. I wondered how it felt to be a missionary tortured for the gospel by not being allowed a toilet. If I died in my chair from a distended bladder everything would just leak out anyway and then I wouldn't have to worry what ANYONE thought of me.
Finally I discreetly pulled out my cellphone to check the time and we agreed to go. We stood up and hugged goodbye and I started towards the bathroom.
"Aren't you parked that way?" Katherine asked, pointing to the door in the opposite direction.
To continue the deception, I started to walk away from the bathroom and towards the door out to my car. (at this point I don't even know how I was able to walk).
My friends, it was at this moment when I finally opened my eyes to the ridiculousness of the whole situation. I envisioned the hour drive back home in my car with the imminent explosion of my bladder and I suddenly thought, I don't care about anything else in the world right now except going pee. I said to Katherine, "Yes, but I need to use the bathroom first." It was so simple, so direct, so forthright and courageous. And I took the first step in the right direction.
Later I replayed Katherine's puzzled last glance in my mind. I wonder what she was thinking. I wonder if she thought, well, why didn't Heather say so 2 hours ago?
As stupid as this all may sound, I learned a lesson last night. When it comes to life, attending to a full bladder is way higher on the priority list than looking good in front of an Italian supermodel.